Shaping Our 2021

Transcription:

Jeff: I ain’t never gonna be perfect. You ain’t gonna be perfect. No, we’re going to be perfect though, but to be better physically, spiritually and emotionally, how can I be better? It does take that openness and, and that is just my hope for myself and for others too, because if we are just stuck in our current orbits, and if we all stay stuck in those current orbits, then we’re not really.

me talking about being blessed and making the most of the gifts that we are given here,

Jon: your journey starts now. Hello, and welcome to this edition of journey coaching podcast. I’m your host today? John Y and I have with me once again, Mr. Jeff Carlson, business man one of the founders of journey coaching, and also our resident, regular guy, Don Evans, Don. Good to see you, Jeff. Good to see you.

Yeah. Happy new year 

Jeff: with that new new day new year. Yay. 

Jon: Yeah, we’ve we’ve made it to 2021. We were not sure. We thought we were gonna. Get to this point. and you know we have expectations, right? We are looking forward to a brand new year. We’ve turned a page. I don’t know about you and making new year’s resolutions.

I tend not to do a lot of those, but maybe you have, and, and I hope so. We’ve got a lot to look forward to. And I guess I want to, I want to toss out a question to both of you tonight in, in, I hope it’s a simple one for you, but maybe not. I’m going to, I’m going to start with you, Don.

Why are you blessed? 

Don: Why do I always got to go first? 

Jon: I love you. 

Don: That’s what I did to you last time 

Jon: to my right. And I tend to lean, right. So I don’t know. 

Don: Never mind. We won’t go there. Right. Okay. 

Jon: But why are you blessed? 

Don: Why am I blessed? Yeah. God created me and Jesus loves me, man. I don’t know how much more blessed and blessed beyond measure, you know, that’s, if you could look at that starting a new year and reflect on that, like maybe every day when you got out of bed, I don’t care what year it is.

It’s going to be better. 

Jon: Jeff, what blesses you? 

Jeff: I think just the gift of life, the gift of time. you know, I, I just look at this and go, wow. You know, life is short. But man, it’s a, what a ride. 

Jon: Yeah, what a ride. 

Jeff: Andso yeah, it’s just been family business stuff stuff with journey. I mean, it’s just like, yeah, I just, I go on it.

We could, we can make this a three hour podcast. 

Jon: We certainly call on our blessings, 

Jeff: many things. 

Jon: Well, I think, I think there’s an important question in there and, And you know, we, we, we feel blessed in different ways. we know we are blessed but yet, do you really feel in your life. like your making an impact like your, your, like you’re world changers.

Right. and I guess the question would be, in what way do you feel like you’re maybe changing some things in the world maybe that starts with changing you first, maybe that starts with changing what you can around you, but do you feel like you’re making a world impact? 

Jeff: You don’t even think that you can even think that we can.

Make a difference because sometimes, I mean, if you step back and look and go, Ooh, some big world out there, there are a lot of people in this world. There’s a lot of stuff, a lot of heavy stuff going on. How, what can I do as one individual person, but as aa uniquely designed. A human being with just a whole bunch of gifts and talents.

Absolutely. and I think that’s part of the message here as we go into a new year’s. Absolutely. you can make a difference. I can make a difference together. We can make a difference. 

Jon: I think we can. I, I found an article on For that kind of laid out the behaviors kind of core behaviors of people who positively impact their world.

Let me share them with you real quick. Just a couple here. they commit to continually bettering themselves. They engage others in open mutually beneficial ways. Hey, can I jump on that one real quick? You can absolutely jump in. 

Jeff: Cause it’s really what we talk about here with the journey and the one-on-one relationships, you know, just that whole engagement, you know, person to person over a cup of coffee, whatever it might be.

I mean, that’s really, really important, really important. 

Jon: They invest time and energy, not in what is, but what can be. I think those relate well to, to what journey and coaching and, and bettering yourselves are all about. They embrace critique. Don, are you good at embracing critique?

Okay. We laugh because you know, I think we all have a major pride in us and sometimes it’s hard to hear. 

Don: Well, I answered that question when you define your version of critique. 

Jon: if I could look at. Things that you do perhaps, or the way you carry yourself or what might be something that I see in my mind is like, boy, if Don did this, this would be something that Don could really grab onto and, and, and improve his life.

But yet when I say that to you would you embrace some of that or would would a wall go up depending 

Don: I would embrace it. I just want us to get your definition and critique. Yeah. I’ve said it openly my whole life. I could take myself harder than anybody. I know I’m very, very hard on myself. I don’t accept failure very well.

struggle with pride issues, which, you know look at in Proverbs, you know, prides really. It gets a little ugly in there. I am focused on you. So how can we be better? I’m still focused for a little over two years now on this might sound wrong. I’m not patting myself on the back, but I want to try to develop some sort of legacy to leave behind rather than he just worked hard all of his life.

And he made a lot of money and he bought a lot of stuff. Right. That doesn’t matter to me anymore over to Jeff’s point a minute ago. And, and including this point about me and what we can do in this new year, if we want to, could we do something? Yes, we could. Any of us could, but remember John, there are.

Two kinds of people in this world, the ones that think they can. I like to think that I can, I think that you are, and Jeff are, we’re the kind of Jeff, Jeff’s a visionary person. You are. I am when we can make a difference, but there’s also the second kind of people that go, you know, I just don’t think I can.

And unfortunately they’re both right? 

Jon: Mm yeah. Yeah, they are. Yeah. Jeff. How do you embrace critique? 

Jeff: I want to think I embrace it well, but not always, you know, not always, but then I, then I go, well, if I am not perfect, right. So if I’m not perfect and none of us are, and if somebody has given me some feedback, isn’t that.

Really a positive thing if they care enough, because most times feedback, most people time, most of the times, people are not just all relaxed. Like, ah, I’ll tell Carlson that he needs to slow down a little bit and spend some more time with his kids or something. You know, that’s not a relaxed thing for people to do.

So if they care enough to have that  of going and come alongside me in this case and saying, Hey, Jeff, how about dial back a little bit? I need to just go, okay. If I really want to grow. I need to yeah, just 

Don: kind of, could it go one step further? Depends on who’s critiquing your eye now. Let’s think about that for a moment.

Let’s as Jeff would say, let’s unpack this, unpack this, and really dig deep into this. Yeah. So. You’re critiqued by me or a coworker. You and I are friends or you’re critique by one of your employees, but what about, and you could handle that. You and I can, but what about when someone you deeply love starts critiquing you?

How well do you and I, and John, how do we handle that? We’ll let John go with this one now. 

Jon: Got it. And say, you know, I am so happy that you decided to tell me what I really, reallyI love you so much. And you know, I wish I could tell you, that’s how I handled things. And then you go and take seven years on this planet, 

Jeff: pick the dog and the cat, right.

It’s like, yeah. 

Jon: One thing, a friend of mine told me, John, you don’t gain wisdom until you get into your fifties, really? Right. And I’m starting to believe that at 57 now, and I’m looking at those things and I, I’m not necessarily maybe happy on the front end that I’ve been critiqued, but now I walk away and I almost always ask myself, okay.

Are they right? And is there some truth in what they’re telling me? And I think that’s the start of, of gaining some wisdom is that you’re not so fast to just dismiss it. You’re more likely. And in my case, I’m more likely to walk away and say, okay, well, what. What is it about that? Why did, why did this person who loves me feel that they should tell me about this?

And so a 20 year old, John, why not in a heartbeat I’d have walked away? or I said something smart. today I’m a little bit more likely to, to handle that in a different way. Especially if it comes from somebody that I, that I trust that I have respect for them and those kinds of things. 

Jeff: And not that these things are easy, right?

I mean, you’re Dean of this critique. Pardon we’ll move on. But the critical thing, it’s not easy, but it comes back to this whole idea of making that decision in our life if we want to grow. So if I want to grow, part of that is getting input from other people and saying, and not to be perfect, you know?

Cause I never gonna be perfect. You ain’t gonna be perfect. No, we’re going to be perfect, but to be better physically, spiritually. emotionally, how can I be better? It, it does take that openness and, and that is just my hope for myself and for others too, because if we are just stuck in our current orbits, and if we all stay stuck in those current orbits, then we’re not really.

talking about being blessed and making the most of the gifts that we are given here for our short time on earth. How sad is that? Right. And we don’t have to have a years and years and years. I mean, we could, there could be people that have just you know, hours, days, weeks left on this earth and they can still make.

A difference. So those of us, fortunately, that we’ll have years left ought. We not get about this in this new year because life is moving along the years are moving along. 

Don: We’re not promised tomorrow. We all three agree on that. 

Jeff: That’s right. 

Jon: Well, continually bettering ourselves, engaging others, open mutual, beneficial ways, investing time and energy, not on what is, but what can be embracing, critique all important.

And part of maybe what we could look for in a new year, a new time, a new page and, and moving forward. also in this article, the core behaviors of people who positively impact the world they spread what they know. And now I mentioned the 57 year old John Y and the 20 year old John, why I thought at 20 years old that I could tell a lot of people what to do.

And how to do it. And I remember a lot of people that are my age now just looking at me and they just even say anything. And they’re just like, All right. Yeah. And so, and they, they were thinking, all right, kid, you know what you go out and make it and try that and, you know, good luck. So that for see how that works out for you.

Right. And, and I think that’s kind of that they spread what they know though in, in people that, that know things that understand things that have some kind of that experience. I think it’s valuable. I look at that as maybe mentorship, is that how you see that a little bit at, you know, they’re willing to be mentored and they’re willing to mentor others.

Don: We all want to learn. So, but also somebody, like you said, you’re 57. I’m 62. If I’m giving somebody regardless of their age advice on something that I’ve done for 40 years, I don’t know. I’d think you’d want to pay attention a little bit, whether it’s coming from you or me, because you got that experience, but just experience alone, isn’t gonna be enough to be for you to think you’re an authority on it, right?

Until you. Define your experience. You can have all the years of experience you want, but once you start evaluating it, then it becomes more valuable than you’d want to spread that with. 

Jon: Yeah. Cause I could have a lot of experience, you know, running into the wall over there, over and over and over again.

And And, and yet it might not be the kind of experience I should share 

Don: stupidity. 

Jon: Well, yeah, I had a friend tell me, I meant to remind, tell me one day says, you know what, John, if you keep pounding your head against the wall, eventually your ears will pop out or you’ll have a very flat forehead. So it is a little flat.

but my ears are out and listening. So but they spread what they know. another one on here, they uplift others as they ascend. And, you know, ascend is kind of a. A big word in here. When I, when I struck that word, I thought of something different. when we were talking about Ascension where we’re believers sitting around his table, but it, it, it struck me how that uplifting of others as they ascend is not just.

I apropos to our lives in general, but the life of Christ and the uplifting of that event as, as he ascended. And soI wonder, you know, how, how close they are to those core behaviors that, you know, we wrap into that that component, our belief. You know, and our faith in Christ and, and, and where that takes us, not just today, but.

But way down the road. you know, I always tell people your attorneys are wrong thing to be wrong about. Right, 

Don: right. But in the terminology that I take it, that you’re using ascendant in this instance is in, and I say this all the time. Don’t I, Jeff, on podcasts, John’s still new with us. He doesn’t remember somebody.

I point the finger at me, Donna all the time. So I’m ascending over the last. Two years I’m moving up in the world. I’ve gotten better. I’m staying healthier. I don’t drink anymore. So would it be just completely wrong of me? Not to want to take others with me as I ascend out of the hole in the pit that I lived in for so many years, that’s the kind of ascend that I think you’re referring to, correct me if I’m wrong.

And I’m thinking about Jesus ascending to heaven. Yeah, well, you’re right. 

Jeff: We’re all followers. 

Jon: Yes. And it also is the, the rising tide raises all ships. Right. And so 

Don: lifting other people up when you’re growing mentally, physically, emotionally, why not reach out and grab a few others and take them with you.

And here. Take them on a journey. 

Jeff: Well, and, and to tie those two together, you know, Christ is sending Christ what his model of, of, of what he has done for us and, you know, living a modeling his life of, of peace and joy and love and patience. I mean, how cool is that? And yeah, as we’re talking about journey and so forth, and this whole coaching thing to do that with somebody else, Even if you, aren’t sure about those things, even if this whole talk about, you know, the spiritual part about Christ is like, wow, what’s that?

That’s just, I don’t, I don’t get that. That’s fine. You know, it’s still good to sit down with someone and go through this and at least be open to the possibilities. 

Jon: the next the next point, the next core value is that they view journey. that journey as a goal. And you know, I love that, that the word he is there, I’m making connections,  making up in my own head journey 

Jeff: as opposed to journey coaching.

But yeah, that’s, that’s yeah, kind of good tire with, 

Jon: but the goal is, you know, I think it’s important to enjoy that process, right. I mean, we’re all on a journey in our lives. are we participating in that? And are we, are we a part of that or are we just kind of watching it roll by us 

Don: here to define a journey when you’re on a good one?

Because when you live a life, that’s. Foiled in every way that you can imagine, you don’t really look at it as a journey. And once you get on one, I’ve shared this with Jeff many times, how my life is different the last two years after journey. So. It’s just, it’s become impossible for me not to want to lead people to journey coaching, because I have, you know, we just, we can dumb it down to a, by the Bible school Bible school kindergarten, you know, Jesus 

Jon: the best two years of my life, 

Jeff: by the way, 

Don: I got kicked out of kindergarten.

That’s good. you know, there wasn’t, there wasn’t a journey book. Jesus didn’t hand his apostles and all of his followers, a book to he. No, no, no. What did he speak in only parables parables, right? No written out book. W. But he led by example and he gave those parables in such confusing ways that we still are writing different versions, trying to figure it out.

It depends on how it’s worded. Doesn’t it. Okay. Well, I don’t understand the NIV. Oh, I know. But see if you’d read the NLT, then it’s easier to understand them. And everybody gets a fight about that. Where’s the grace there. I don’t really know. But yeah, you just want to take people on a journey, but Jeff and I’ve had private conversations and I’ll throw it into a podcast right now, sometimes based on my 62 years of existence, the only time in my life where I’ve been able to stay focused is getting on a journey and staying on it.

But. Taking people with me to build the group larger. You know, if you are so self-centered, once you’ve, let’s say seen the light and you recognize that life is better when you don’t live in a bottom of a bottle or on a bar stool. And you see the grace and the glory that Jesus provides for you and your life turns around, then you, you have an in-depth vision.

And I said it before, I can spot people that are in a mass, John and Jeff so easily. Do you know how I can do that? Because you’ve been there. I am a mess yet. So I want to take those people with me 

Jon: and, you know, I I’m glad you said that because it really. leads to the last point that there was in this article and that is core behaviors for people who positively impact the world, use their power and influence as well.

And the word power is really kind of a unique word in here, because I think you can take that in aa negative context, right? Like you’re, . Power over somebody else. I think the power comes in. Everything else that came through this last, all these other points to this one, the power is we have the ability to be critiqued, to spread what we know to uplift others to view the journey as a goal, to invest our time and energy.

That’s the power sharing, what you know, and, and with others and in helping them through that process in being someone of influence. Is is how we can impact our world. And you don’t have to be Elan Musk and be a multi-billionaire. you simply have to be yourself and realize what your own powers are and your own abilities are.

And in what that influence over the people that you work with and know could be. In a positive way 

Jeff: and to get outside of yourself too. Right? I mean, for me personally, if I’m just, if I’m feeling stuck, anxious down, whatever as soon as I intentionally have to move forward and go, okay, well, what can I look at outside of myself to serve somebody else?

And it relates to, and we’ll talk about this in a future podcast. Cause it just, it, it just is a, another topic unto itself, but the whole concept of getting into the game, rather than just watching the game and how much easier is it to watch the game? Sports politics, whatever it is, right. Life critiquing others, rather than actually getting in the game and doing the best we can with this one and only life we’re given.

And it, it, it’s just, it’s a huge, huge game changing factor. To actually get into the game. Right. 

Don: I agree with you could even use the word it’s why is it so hard for people to engage, 

Jeff: engage, just get, 

Don: be a part of something that’s, you know, way beyond you 

Jeff: and what no. Right. New year, new you kind of thing.

Right. So 

Jon: I was going to a nice ender would be gentlemenWhat’s your, what’s your resolution, Jeff . We looked at all these things. What are you thinking for yourself personally, for, for this year, as far as how you might live those core values, those core principles. Well, 

Jeff: to me, it comes down to this really cool thing, and this is going to sound like a little commercial for journey.

So, but so be it, but it’s this really cool thing that we’re involved with. And I just hope that this moves forward. really well in this new year, because anything that I can do any little part that you know, all of us can do around this table, as this moves forward, we just want to help. it’s it’s the little call to action we have.

If you want to grow, we want to help. So I guess my thing would be isOh, if I can help. Some more people than I did last year, even one more than last year. How cool is that? 

Jon: 

Jeff: and I’m a business guy, so I, you know, in a business, I look at profitability. I don’t give a rip if next year I’ve make a dollar more than I did.

Last year. I really don’t. I really don’t care, 

Don: but I mean, 

Jeff: I really do care about if I can affect one more person’s life in a positive way, then it’s then it’s a win. 

Jon: Yep. That’s great. Don, for you, what would you, what would you add on your list? 

Don: List of things for Don to improve and grow. That’s going to be a laundry.

Jon: We don’t need the 

Don: wait. I see you. Hold your hand up. We’re running out of time. We got less than two minutes 

Jon: and five hours. We need to wrap this up. 

Don: Personality, growth, patience. More wisdom. Flexibility would be comes to mind. I wasn’t even thinking about that. I didn’t even think you were going to ask me after Jeff or I would have tried to get ahead of you a little bit.

So I got to catch up again. 

Jon: I didn’t want to leave you hanging, 

Don: right? Yeah. Thanks, John. Seriously, just be a better person, better understanding person and not take things as we were talking about earlier out of context, sometimes I am so guilty of hearing something. A comment is made and I misconstrue it and I hear something completely different than what that person has meant.

And I might believe it or not. I even miss a joke when somebody is kid number that sharks had done in John, when you didn’t get that dynamite, no hurt my feelings. I’m really just grow and be a better person. 2021. 

Jon: So to understand sarcasm better would be one of the 

Jeff: new year’s resolutions 

Don: and me to quit using so much.

I left that one out. Don has got to be less sarcastic. 

Jon: Well, gentlemen, you know, you’re both on a journey. 

Don: Yeah. Not getting off that easy. What’s John going to do? No, I know where the off buttons. 

Jon: You know it, mine would really be along the lines of, of yours. I think, you know, you’re never at a point of life where I think you have it all figured out.

Right. And in journey coaching, having just gone through some of the coaching againand have been coached byby, in other ways in my whole life, whether it’s athletics or part of what I do in myin my life and in workI don’t think you’re ever too old. to be coached and to have a mentor, to have a coach, to have somebody that is, helping you pour into your life.

I’ve always told people, I stole this totally from somebody, you know, a friend is somebody who loves you no matter what, right? A mentor and I’d even say a coach is somebody who loves you too much to let you stay that way. And so you know, as you go through that journey in life, that’s, that’s mine to, to keep my eyes open, to be able to, to comprehend and and to be able to, to, to pour not only.

Into someone else’s life, but to be able to, to have my life except some of that that living water as well because I’m not always really good at accepting those gifts. And so that would be my, my resolution for this next year. and you know, one way folks that you can be involved in that and to be in that journey is to go to journey coaching dot orgy.

great website opportunity on there to let us know who you are and, and what you’re looking for. you can download the materials on there. Take a look at, the seven steps that are a part of that coaching and get in a relationship. be a part of that. so journey, coaching, relationship, strengths, and purposes, what we’re all about, and that’s why we do these podcasts.

we hope you enjoy them. we really are just a bunch of regular guys sitting around here tonight, talking to you from Iowa and we’re loving it very much. So we encourage you to begin to maximize your life through one-on-one coaching. And until next time I’m John Y. Thank you for listening tune in next time and make sure you like and subscribe.

Visit us@journeycoaching.org and check us out on Facebook and Instagram. Start your own journey@journeycoaching.org.